Thursday, December 6, 2007

Be Authentic...

This is a series titled Authenticity. Watercolor paper as my canvas. Acrylic, chalk, effy stuff, you know, mixed media. Two things happened that made me think about being authentic. It went like this.

I was thinking of how to gift my young teenage friends at Heartwood College of Art. There are four of them and they have made such an impression on my heart. I am den mother. That's what they call me. They ask my opinion. We have deep discussions, I buy them chocolate.

"What could I do" I kept asking myself "They are all so different." Take Anna for example. Her hair is pink, purple, green, blue and maybe even brown. I don't know what color her real hair is, she loves to add spark to her hair. She loves the movie the Labryinth and loves to swear.

JoAnna has hair that reaches her bum. She has huge brown eyes and a beautiful smile. She attends church faithfully, speaks softly and carefully. She's gentle and focused and accepts everyone.

Nathaniel is a spark! He's done every drug known to man and is a walking pharmacologist. He admits to his downfalls and he is stressed out a LOT for someone his age. He is convinced of his short time here on earth and he is a DOLL!! He won my heart almost in the first hour I met him. His pain reminds me of someone close to me. And I can't forget that he's a poet, too.

Desaraie is just so sweet, the face of a little fairy. "I'm not gonna lie" she said on the first day "I can't draw." She is going to school for photography but her heart is with her many pets. The dog, the fish, the cat. Oh her tender heart and her lazy boyfriend have taught me tons.

See, they're different these kids, and I want them to know that different is good. I want them to stay different, keep their qualities even when the world says they shouldn't. It's hard sometimes because you just want to fit in but really now, how do you put a square peg in a round hole? I wish someone had told me how to keep my authenticity. I am just now returning to myself.

In honor of my friends in color and design. I love you.

11 x 14...different is good.

The next two came to be in this way:

I've had a few days off now and am still absorbing the new energy from my spiritual retreat. Yesterday I spent a little bit of time on the net checking my horoscope etc. I went to check Celia Fenn's monthly report of the energies for this month as well. She had a message about the request to be authentic. It was a detailed account of how good it is for your soul and how to go about it. The words touched me. It was what I needed to hear.

Living in small town America can really squelch a persons growth. When people glance at you sideways and then lift their hand to cover their whispers it cuts deep and steals from you. I have always felt different and finally when I decided to just be me the whispering began. It's a struggle that I want to win.

Below are two paintings based on the information from the message of Celia Fenn.

Don't Resist the Flow, 10" x 10", mixed media

You Don't Need to Fit In, 10" x 10", mixed media

Then it was on to fimo fun. I made covered bobby pins, earrings, necklaces, pendants, and MORE! Now I just have to package them.

And then....
Okay, so I don't generally end my entries with a giNORMOUS picture of my face, but here I am in all my authentic glory. Heh heh. I woke up happy and willing to just go with the flow.

I slipped out of my pink polka dot jammies (did you have any doubt about my bed attire?) into some jeans a smart black t-shirt and my favorite denim-go-to-studio overshirt. I donned the new earrings I made and embellished the overshirt with a pink fimo pin. The hair, she called for ponytails and I was thrilled to discover my hair has gr0wn enough to comply.

HERE I AM WORLD! Authentically me. Silly. Quirky. Unusually happy (considering). Still sporting blue eyes and adding crows feet and laugh lines daily.

Tam I am. Huh, whooda thunk it?

Learn your place in the dance of life and go with the flow. Be authentic.


Druinda & Lady E. said...

Tammy Girl,

Tears of JOY are coming to me as I read your entries! Especially the one on being different. I LOVE your art, your ideas, the flow you give to life itself! You are perfect and beautiful and we, the world, are blessed to be in your presence!

Love, Rhonda

mormar said...

You are an inspiration to be authentic.

Wyanne said...

Thank you so much for this incredible post! I love all you do! Many blessings, Love, Wyanne

Susan Tuttle said...

What a great post on authenticity--those whispering folks--they secretly wish they could be like you.

Love the artwork!


ps--thank you for your kind message on my blog. I am so sorry to hear about your friend's passing.

angela said...

those kids are lucky to have crossed paths with you, wish i had someone like you when i was that age. your post here is beautiful.

Vandal said...

Tammy, thank you so much for your kind words about us all, I had no idea we had such an impact. I think a person would have to be blind to not notice your authenticity. Such genuine empathy and openness are rare finds, yet you possess both. Keep up the beautiful artwork, keep smiling, and embrace the unknown!

Love always,